Weird things happen when you have MS. I may have mentioned my oatmeal ended up with my dishes last week. And an empty milk carton was found in my refrigerator. But this is the most curious event of recent months.
So peanut butter. I eat a lot of PB&J. It's quick, cheap, and easy. I'm also not too picky on brand because budget.I prefer natural peanut butter with two ingrediants, peanuts and salt, but my current jar is the regular Great Value pb because budget. Again. I am curious though, why PB with additives is so much cheaper than just plain PB. You'd think natural PB would be cheaper because it's just peanuts. Maybe there's a lot more oil and sugar in the cheap peanut butter than we really think there is...I'm sorry. I digress.
As I said, my current PB is regular GV brand. The jar before that was a brand called 100% Peanuts. Only one ingrediant: peanuts. Personally, I actually didn't think it was that great, in case you care. And the jar before that was a jar of the Aldi brand natural peanut butter. Why am I telling you this? I want you to know that I know what peanut butter I'm talking about because I buy whatever I can at whatever store I'm at when I need peanut butter. And the last three happen to have been all different.
On with the story. A while back, when I was almost out of my 100% Peanuts jar, I looked on my counter and found the empty Aldi PB jar. Weird. But maybe I just forgot it there? Maybe I was saving it to let the dog lick it out for a treat? I don't know. It was there for who knows how long. So, as a responsible adult, I threw it away.
Or so I thought...
Several days later as I was sweeping the floor I find the exact same Aldi PB jar on the kitchen floor. Well that's weird. Maybe I only thought about throwing it away, but didn't actually do it. That's very possible. I think about things that need to be done in one moment, and in the next, it just flies out of my mind as if the thought never existed. (Would you believe I passed quizzes and tests in college without ever once looking at the notes between classes?) I admitted, I am fallible. I picked up the jar and threw it away. And that was that.
Or so I thought....
This morning as I'm making me coffee and packing my lunch I see something on the counter. Would you believe it was the VERY SAME JAR??? The PB jar that I thought I'd thrown away at least two, possibly three or more times before! This is going beyond the weird into odd. Once or twice I could see myself thinking I did something that I didn't, but at least three times? No way.
MS plays tricks with your brain. I think I do things that I don't. I've also done things that I don't remember doing. My short term memory has definitely taken a hit these last two years. It's one of the more frustrating symptoms for me. I'm used to relying on my mind for so many things--up to and including my value as a person. With the failing of my mind, I've had to learn that there is a lot more that makes up a person's worth. I have to accept that at least three times I did not throw away the empty peanut butter jar. That the same brain that put my current PB in the fridge yesterday told me that I did something that I did not do. It's my new normal.
I've had to adapt. I write notes and lists now. I set alarms so I remember to give the cat her meds. I have a daily pill box so I don't have to worry about whether or not I took my own meds. I use planners and trackers...and still, many days I still don't keep up. But I keep going on. When my brain slips up I either find a practical way to compensate or accept that there is nothing I can do.
And life goes on. After all, no use crying over forgetting about a PB jar...unless...no! But yet...there's the possibility... COULD MY HOME BE HAUNTED?!?!?!?!?
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